John Idaho

Come gather round and find a seat

The table has been set

Let’s all give thanks

The Quaker says

Snuffs out his cigarette

The woman clothed in sun attends

A kitchen cut in half

Makes do in labor and in pain

Good father’s chief of staff

A little bearish looking man

Sits at the children’s table

All he can do is bang his shoe

And mock the pilgrim’s fables

We’ve all come here for this premiere

And he has sealed his fate

In color and for all to see

The world premiere Kitchen Debate

One year we’ll din at Stonewall Inn

And we will all remember

When we saw tricky dicky win

That fifth day of November

For by his stripes and falling stars

He whipped the mashed potatoes

He made with Mao who anyhow

Threw overripe tomatoes

The turkey flew the trouble brewed

They dined on protest songs

And spit on soldiers coming home

Then raised a bong to Viet Cong

Those troops on highway 61

All squealed at Watergate

Their only war was Warren Court

Let’s roll it stoned Kitchen Debate

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Now praying hands in southern lands

Give thanks down at the nut farm

Over the river Ford broke down

We shuddered through the woods unharmed

We passed a bunny on a cross

Encountered bloodless cattle

Invoked Saint Helens for a sign

Who heartless seized the chattel

Then Jelly Belly met PacMan

But I just had to laugh

The biggest fan ignored the ban

With Lennon’s final autograph

The hawks who circled round the Haig

Raised ray guns sure and straight

For one last shining episode

In analog, Kitchen Debate

Thick gravy trickles down the plates

Our festive season starts

With swine who turn the pearls to wine

And drunken monkeys playing darts

Too big to fail too rich to jail

Too small to even matter

The moneychangers post the bail

The Buddha’s getting fatter.

Fed at the shrine of loan-shark brine

Deep in the swampy lake bed

The turning tide exposed the banks

And found them swimming naked

Behind the Bush the weapons lie

Declared the fourth estate

Ted talked while Jesus wept and cried

“I saw them on Kitchen Debate”

Black Friday stunk, Red Christmas, sunk.

This calls for drastic measures.

The gold man empties out white sacks

And coins his greenest treasures

He struck their heads with John McCain

Cause finer busts were taken

He put Kim Jong Un on their tails

And spent them all on bacon

Gen’ral frog calls yellow dog

Across the kitchen border

Says should I laugh or should I lie

And signs another order

I hear the old gray swan is gone

Enquire into her fate

Could Time be dead? He yelps instead

And logs on to Kitchen Debate

We’re back together, it’s so good

To all be face to face

The whole gang made it virtually

A feast at every place

Open your mouth and push it down

Consumers, let us pray

Lord, let them all eat cupcakes

And do just what we say

Let’s share our crumbs and raise our thumbs

To hope and change and fables

They’re having much more fun it seems

Down at the children’s table

Small narcissistic differences

Keep them up hella late

While Huffing posts of Starbuck’s toast

Stay up and binge Kitchen Debate

They play divide-and-conquer games

The ends against the middle

The middle takes it in both ends

Good censor plays the fiddle

He turned the screw she said me too

Those vampires in the sun

So said the bride to Mr. Hyde

There’s nowhere left to run

Our lord, our Ford, has testified

A yin and yang embroiled

They without sin post the first meme

No civil servant takes the spoils

Lost lovers turn alone in bed

Can’t even masturbate

All out of fucks, none left to give

Scroll on and tap Kitchen Debate

Cassandra waits impatiently

To serve the kitchen roast

As Wang Lung’s uncle chews the fat

Another house the same old toast

Of not a crook, tear down the wall

And you can keep your plan

Sex with that woman, read my lips

You’re fired, Rocket Man

The father now against the son

The mom against the daughter

Uncivil disobedience

And Titus serves the slaughter

Attention Hogg sells picket signs

We hate you for your hate

Ask what you’ve done to your country

Was quoted on Kitchen Debate

A double singularity

As Colonel Corso waits

For armies small not freakishly

The alien Kitchen Debate

Pope, grope, hope, dope, soft-soap, more rope

Let’s hang it on Kitchen Debate

And Nostradamus laughs out loud

It just goes on Kitchen Debate

And no-on here gets out alive

We’re out of time, Kitchen Debate.

Cause history is you and me

Repeating crime, Kitchen Debate

© 2019 John Idaho LLC